This week there has been outrage on social media because Parental Alienation has been removed from the guidance notes of the Domestic Abuse Bill in the UK.
As with the term Grandparent Alienation, PA is a toxic area, and always attracts very extreme views. The reasons for that are complex.
It is a political hot potato and although cross party agrees that denying contact to any family member is wrong for children, they will always fall short of making changes.
The toxic arguments continue.
In fact although the words Parental Alienation are not mentioned the behaviour of such is included. Many “alienating behaviours” ARE in statutory guidance on DA. They sit within psychological & emotional abuse and coercive controlling behaviour.
Those who are against PA will argue that it is pseudo-science and that it is used mainly by abusive men, most of us know that it is not gender specific, and that many mums are also impacted by alienating behaviours.
So here I go and am about to say something that many will be angry about, it is controversial but there comes a time when we have to change tack.
For me, it is time to stop using the term Parental Alienation, it is not about denying it happens, but for years now the Parental Alienation campaigns have come up against these brick walls. The radical feminists will never accept it and they are a very powerful lobbying force. No government will ever stand up against them for fear of discrimination.
All that happens is that opposing views hit social media in a frenzy, hurling extreme abuse at one another.
As always, in the middle of this toxic arena, are children.
Children experiencing the emotional abuse of being denied contact with all those they love.
It has been said, often, that anyone who wont use the Parental Alienation term is complicit which is not helpful in moving forward.
Terminology and language are important.
To raise awareness of how we can help children we have to be reimagine how we help and support families who are going through a breakdown in all its forms, how we can all work together to make sure that all children can have the thing they all want, a happy and healthy family.
We have to work towards a social and cultural change, education is key.
As I have said so many times, denying contact has to become as socially unacceptable as drink driving or getting into a car and not putting your seatbelt on.
