We all know how devastating it is when you lose contact with your grandchildren, and many grandparents ask me how can they deal with the heartbreak.
Everyone will have their own strategies to learn to cope.
Here are a few ideas.
Setting up a memory box can be helpful.
Buy yourself a special box and add things that you think your grandchildren would like to see.
It may be photos of a family event, toys that meant something to them, letters, photocopies of birthday, Christmas cards you have sent.
What you are doing is building up evidence for your grandchildren, evidence that you never forgot them, never stopped loving them.
If you like to write, start a journal, write it as though you are talking to them, a written conversation.
Starting a blog on the internet is another way, of keeping ‘contact.’
You will be surprised to see what a positive thing doing these things can be.
I also wrote poems, I had never written a poem in my life, but it just seemed to happen, I was able to articulate my feelings in those words.
I am an avid gardener and know how it helped to be out in the garden, being with nature is always a positive and healing thing to do. You can just stand and listen to the noises around you, or pick up that spade and start digging.
Planting special plants or bulbs for their birthdays is lovely, plant the ones that will actually flower on your grandchild’s birthday.
Some of you will know that BGSG planted three sycamore trees at Dyrham Park a couple of years ago, our legacy to our grandchildren.
Set up a support group in your area.
Becoming involved with raising awareness is another way of becoming pro-active, so if you haven’t already, write to your MP, make an appointment to see them, remember they are working for you.
Make sure that you focus on the emotional abuse that is being caused to your grandchildren, that alienation of children causes life long damage. Highlight the large numbers of young people who are suffering from mental health issues and that family breakdown is playing its part.
Whatever you do, channel those negative thoughts into positive ones by being active in being the voice of your grandchildren.
We can and we will make a difference.
